Regrets. You’re not supposed to have them, are you?
Well, some days I personally find it hard to not wonder what life might be like now if I had made a different decision. But while I’m not the kind of person who can hold my head high and say ‘everything happens for a reason’, I also know there is no point in dwelling on what could be, because you end up being your own worst enemy.
Like most people, though, I do struggle at times. I especially find it hard to not regret some of my career choices.
About a year ago I was on track to becoming a journalist and while I did have days when I felt like giving up and staying in a job which bored me to tears, I was very determined to stick with it and fulfil my dream.
When I was finally offered an opportunity to be a reporter at a local paper, it was the best thing ever. But not long into the job, I started questioning if this was what I wanted after all. It turned out that my ‘dream job’ was, in fact, a total nightmare. The long hours I could cope with, and I knew the criticism was just part of it all. But, for me, the atmosphere was horrible. I dreaded going to work and there were more than a few times when I cried in the toilets once I was there.
Soon, I found myself thinking that I had made a huge mistake leaving my old job for this. I missed having no financial worries and feeling respected and appreciated by my colleagues. If I worked half an hour longer than I had to, my then manager would come over and tell me to not work too late. He knew how hard I worked, and when I left after three and a half years with the company he told that if I ever needed a job, there was always one there for me.
So eight months after I embarked on what was supposed to be the job I would be in for life, I’m going back to the job I once thought I hated. I can’t say I’m over the moon about returning but if all of this has taught me anything it’s that there really is more to life than finding that dream job. When you consider that the average person will spend 30% of their life working, I know that I would much rather work with nice people and feeling like I am valued as a colleague, rather than working all hours God sends in a job that sounds exciting, only to feel unappreciated and unhappy.
That’s not to say I am giving up a journalism. The bottom line is, I love writing, and I do hope that one day I get the opportunity to write full-time for a living and find a job that ticks all my boxes. For now, I plan to freelance in my spare time and enjoy being back in London.
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